DEAR MISS MANNERS: When is it acceptable to ask for a distinct desk when being seated at a restaurant?
My husband and I’ve a favourite restaurant, which doesn’t take reservations. Up to now month, we have now been seated as soon as by the restrooms and as soon as by the kitchen.
The second time, I politely requested the hostess if we might have one other desk, and he or she gracefully complied. I thanked her profusely and made certain to go away a very good tip for our waiter. The restaurant was busy, however there have been loads of open tables and no ready time, so I didn’t really feel I used to be being unreasonable.
My husband was upset and advised me I shouldn’t have requested to be seated elsewhere. He sulked for a very good a part of the meal.
This has occurred earlier than, and whereas I’ll generally settle for the seating to keep away from an argument, it usually makes the meal much less appetizing for me. The nearness to a restroom and its accompanying site visitors and smells is disagreeable, and if there are open seats elsewhere, I’ll ask to be reseated.
Am I mistaken to take action? I’d drastically admire your opinion.
GENTLE READER: However your husband is not going to. The etiquette downside right here will not be the seating, however the sulking.
He has made the widespread mistake of believing {that a} restaurant is one thing greater than a industrial institution, which advantages from satisfying its prospects. In your case, particularly, as you might be common prospects, the chance to please you by making a easy adjustment needs to be welcome — because it apparently was.
Miss Manners is conscious that eating places have their share of impolite prospects, who behave as if the kitchen employees have been their private cooks and reprimand the employees as in the event that they have been their very own (mistreated) servants. However you aren’t one among them.
Your husband, nonetheless, errors restaurateurs for social hosts, whom it could be impolite to criticize. Particularly, he’s pondering of the imply type of social hosts, who make a pastime of snickering at everybody’s desk manners.
DEAR MISS MANNERS: Whereas procuring, I noticed that my favourite bar cleaning soap was on sale at a shelf-clearing worth. I loaded up my cart with rhapsodic ideas of not having to purchase cleaning soap for fairly a while, and stood in line on the money register.
Two very aged girls checked out my cleaning soap haul and one among them exclaimed, “You couldn’t probably be that soiled!”
I then seen that their cart was brimming over with rolls and rolls of bathroom paper. I used to be tempted — oh, boy, was I tempted — to reply that they couldn’t probably be that filled with … however as an alternative counted to 10 and easily smiled as sweetly as I might muster.
Do you admire my restraint, Miss Manners?
GENTLE READER: Immensely.
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I do know it’s customary to nonetheless ship a present to some getting married when you’re unable to attend the occasion. Does the identical customized embrace different kinds of events, like graduations or retirements?
GENTLE READER: No, it’s not customary, even for weddings. Miss Manners doesn’t wish to spoil anybody’s fundraising initiatives, however solely congratulations and greatest needs are required.
Please ship your inquiries to Miss Manners at her web site, www.missmanners.com; to her electronic mail, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or by postal mail to Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas Metropolis, MO 64106.