DEAR HARRIETTE: I’ve a feminine co-worker in her 30s with whom I’ve developed an ideal friendship over the previous few months.
A couple of days in the past, she came to visit for a household gathering I used to be having. Whereas she was at my home, she met my son (additionally in his 30s), and the 2 of them appeared to hit it off very nicely. They have been very shut and cuddly all evening. I actually didn’t thoughts since they’re each consenting adults.
Nonetheless, at work at this time, she type of cornered me and requested why my son hadn’t known as her. I requested her to please go away me out of it, however I can inform she’s nonetheless bothered.
What ought to I do?
— Messy Scenario
DEAR MESSY SITUATION: You actually don’t need to get in the midst of no matter is budding between your co-worker and your son, however chances are you’ll need to step in and set some tips for each of them.
You have been proper to inform her that she has to deal with her enterprise and that you just can’t be concerned.
Nonetheless, since it’s your son, it is best to converse to him and ask him what his intentions are. Remind him that this girl works with you, so nonetheless he treats her will straight impression you. Ask him to determine what’s on his thoughts. If he doesn’t plan to see her once more, ask him to inform her properly that he had enjoyable however doesn’t plan to take it additional. If he needs to see her once more, he ought to inform her that and act accordingly.
Level out that you don’t intend to be in the midst of a possible relationship, however you do want him to deal with her with respect — as you’ll count on of him in any relationship. Inform him to keep in mind that that is your co-worker, so you might be routinely concerned although you don’t need to be.
DEAR HARRIETTE: I lately went on a bunch journey with some buddies the place we stayed in a pleasant rental home. Sadly, I acquired assigned to a small room with a bunk mattress.
Though it was initially nice, I discovered myself feeling uncomfortable and cramped. I made the choice to change to a lodge the place I may have a big room all to myself for the rest of the journey. I nonetheless frolicked with my buddies through the day and did group actions; I simply didn’t keep on the rental property with them.
My buddies appeared actually harm and irritated that I stayed in a lodge as an alternative of with them, however I did it for causes of consolation and never as a result of I didn’t need to be round them.
They mentioned the truth that I didn’t keep beneath the identical roof with them took away from the group journey expertise. Was I within the unsuitable?
— Smallest Room
DEAR SMALLEST ROOM: Did you categorical your dismay in regards to the room earlier than you left? You can have informed all of them about your discomfort and requested if anybody needed to change with you. Giving them the possibility to step up may need helped.
In the long run, it’s comprehensible that they felt you deserted them and equally comprehensible that you just selected to place your head down on a snug mattress.
Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founding father of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to assist individuals entry and activate their desires. You’ll be able to ship inquiries to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas Metropolis, MO 64106.
